I've always had a belief that letting go of the past is essential in creating an abundant future. This goes for everything including love life, career path, family stuff or other issues. In my life and the lives of my friends, family and clients, this belief has proven to be accurate. Yes, it's easier said than done. Some of the worst things I've gone through was due to letting go. Getting rid of anger and resentment being the most difficult.
Everything comes to the surface when we decide to move forward and leave the past behind. It's like looking into a magnifying mirror 24 hours a day until the issues cease to exist. I saw every little pore and the dirt inside. Each scar was highlighted and I had to experience those events all over again. It's easy to claim the victim stance in those negative situations, but it takes strength and bravery to admit the truth: We contributed to the drama, chose our reactions and created an outcome we didn't like or want.
Most people carry on in life, unaware of how their actions affect other people. I've been guilty of this plenty of times in the past. Even if I had good intentions while making a decision, someone else didn't like it and reacted in a way that didn't connect with me, which put us at "odds" or turned us into rivals. That's life, that's how people can be and that's also the art of assuming.
Isn't this the reason most drama filled situations occur? One person does something, someone else doesn't approve and that individual reacts without asking questions. Ah yes, questions. Here are some we should be asking before we start reacting:
Am I'm wrong about their intentions?
Am I sure that person is really "out to get" me?
Could their decision end up being in my best interest?
Could the outcome be better than I imagine?
Would my life really be better if they disappeared?
If we don't know the answers to the above questions, what would be the best course of action? ASK that person! That's right people. Never ASSume. ASK. Sure, you may not like the answers you get, but at least you won't be living in your head, always ASSuming the worst of your situation and/or the people in it. That's not living at all. Speaking of which, that has got to be the most jarring revelation I had while cleansing my mind, body and spirit of the unnatural junk I was carrying. I wasn't living my life.
We can be accountable for our part in the drama, if we did in fact contribute. Sometimes though, there are people who will stay confined to a box and see only what they want to see. That is their choice. How we react to it is ours. If we don't like it, there's no need to try and change it. That's their view, their life and their responsibility. It may be best to check out of that situation or relationship. I've been known to do that often as well. I believe in accepting people as they are and if it doesn't work for me, well...you know. Adios! Sound cold? Believe me, it most certainly is not. It's called self-preservation in a healthy manner.
I've come across quite a few people who ASSume they know what I'm thinking, what my intentions are and who I really am. Guess what? They never asked me directly and they still don't have a clue. Some think I'm a push-over. Some think I'm the devil incarnate. Some think I'm controlling. Some say I bring out their insecurities. Some think I'm the nicest, most caring person they've ever met. A nice mixed bag I have there, right? It's really interesting to see how many folks make those assumptions and stick to them like super glue. Some have even made choices in their own lives based upon their perception of me. How stupid! Make no mistake, I'm getting a good laugh out of that one.
The most laughable thing I've seen some people do is create drama in the present based on events from the past. I say it's crazy, but to them, it's their reality. These people will hold on to an issue, feeling or event for so long, they forget that the other person has moved on to bigger and better things. Now granted, I understand that feelings don't just disappear, but if you want to be HAPPY, you have to let them go. If it's not the current reality, it needs to go immediately.
We all have access to the same roads, destinations and exits. We can maneuver our vehicles to either proceed forward or we can stay fixated on the rear view mirror. Waiting for our past to catch up and hoping that when it does the reality will be different, isn't very realistic. Again though, you are the only person in control of your vehicle. Where you choose to go will determine what your life will be like.
Everything comes to the surface when we decide to move forward and leave the past behind. It's like looking into a magnifying mirror 24 hours a day until the issues cease to exist. I saw every little pore and the dirt inside. Each scar was highlighted and I had to experience those events all over again. It's easy to claim the victim stance in those negative situations, but it takes strength and bravery to admit the truth: We contributed to the drama, chose our reactions and created an outcome we didn't like or want.
Most people carry on in life, unaware of how their actions affect other people. I've been guilty of this plenty of times in the past. Even if I had good intentions while making a decision, someone else didn't like it and reacted in a way that didn't connect with me, which put us at "odds" or turned us into rivals. That's life, that's how people can be and that's also the art of assuming.
Isn't this the reason most drama filled situations occur? One person does something, someone else doesn't approve and that individual reacts without asking questions. Ah yes, questions. Here are some we should be asking before we start reacting:
Am I'm wrong about their intentions?
Am I sure that person is really "out to get" me?
Could their decision end up being in my best interest?
Could the outcome be better than I imagine?
Would my life really be better if they disappeared?
If we don't know the answers to the above questions, what would be the best course of action? ASK that person! That's right people. Never ASSume. ASK. Sure, you may not like the answers you get, but at least you won't be living in your head, always ASSuming the worst of your situation and/or the people in it. That's not living at all. Speaking of which, that has got to be the most jarring revelation I had while cleansing my mind, body and spirit of the unnatural junk I was carrying. I wasn't living my life.
We can be accountable for our part in the drama, if we did in fact contribute. Sometimes though, there are people who will stay confined to a box and see only what they want to see. That is their choice. How we react to it is ours. If we don't like it, there's no need to try and change it. That's their view, their life and their responsibility. It may be best to check out of that situation or relationship. I've been known to do that often as well. I believe in accepting people as they are and if it doesn't work for me, well...you know. Adios! Sound cold? Believe me, it most certainly is not. It's called self-preservation in a healthy manner.
I've come across quite a few people who ASSume they know what I'm thinking, what my intentions are and who I really am. Guess what? They never asked me directly and they still don't have a clue. Some think I'm a push-over. Some think I'm the devil incarnate. Some think I'm controlling. Some say I bring out their insecurities. Some think I'm the nicest, most caring person they've ever met. A nice mixed bag I have there, right? It's really interesting to see how many folks make those assumptions and stick to them like super glue. Some have even made choices in their own lives based upon their perception of me. How stupid! Make no mistake, I'm getting a good laugh out of that one.
The most laughable thing I've seen some people do is create drama in the present based on events from the past. I say it's crazy, but to them, it's their reality. These people will hold on to an issue, feeling or event for so long, they forget that the other person has moved on to bigger and better things. Now granted, I understand that feelings don't just disappear, but if you want to be HAPPY, you have to let them go. If it's not the current reality, it needs to go immediately.
We all have access to the same roads, destinations and exits. We can maneuver our vehicles to either proceed forward or we can stay fixated on the rear view mirror. Waiting for our past to catch up and hoping that when it does the reality will be different, isn't very realistic. Again though, you are the only person in control of your vehicle. Where you choose to go will determine what your life will be like.
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