Our thoughts, words and actions change every moment of every single day. At least mine do. When the sun comes up each morning, I feel like a different person because I start out with a new perspective. I am not who I was yesterday. Sometimes I have so many thoughts that I just have to stop and get some air. I think everyone is like this. Nobody is perfectly balanced and when we actually feel like we've gotten close, we had to work hard for it.
After I finished cleaning my office today, another epiphany came to me. Since March, I've spent more time taking care of other people and their issues that I've let myself fall by the wayside. I'm talking about my friends, my goals, my health and just my life in general. There weren't enough hours in the day to complete everything, so I thought, "You'll get your needs met tomorrow, Cristin." Of course tomorrow came and went. Still no time for Cristin's needs, but whose fault is that really? Mine, most definitely. So today I decided that I have to find a new way to compartmentalize my day to achieve my personal goals. My son's needs are my #1 priority, so I'm not talking about him here.
There are so many facets to a woman, it's not even funny. I think we've been physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually programmed for multi-tasking. Yes, at times it can appear to be too much, but that's only when we decide to stretch our energy to accommodate someone's smelly garbage. We have a tendency to take on other people's problems as if they're our own, unbeknownst to us. We also try our very best to take care of others' needs due to our need for accomplishment in certain areas of our lives. I generally don't feel the need to seek validation that way, but I seem to have formed that habit accidentally. Perhaps motherhood is to blame, I don't know. What I do know is this: During the last 8 months, I haven't done one note-worthy thing for myself...and that stops RIGHT NOW.
Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I love my son. I love the career path I've chosen. I love my family. I love my friends. I love my cats. I love my home and when I upgrade to a new one, I'll love that one as well. There's much more I haven't mentioned and I love those things too. Is there anything wrong with what I have? Absolutely NOT. I'm grateful. Grateful to my higher power for giving me the ability to create. I did this and without help. So why am I thinking so much? There's something missing and I can't exactly put my finger on it. I'm pretty sure I'd be happier if I had all those things I love so much in my daily routine. Ah, but that's just not possible, now is it?
There's always something that could make us happier with life, but I've always believed that one must want what they already have to achieve happiness and to be able to attract something new. I'm thankful. I love what I have. I think I just need to balance my time, like I said before. I think what bothers me the most is that I've allowed other people's crap to stunt my growth and take up so much of my time. Yes, you're sensing a tiny bit of resentment here, but don't worry, I'm taking care of that. The resentment is really directed toward myself, not anyone else in particular.
Here's the good news though. Yes I feel my time, energy, finances and the fact that I work from home has been taken advantage of over the years. Yes I acknowledge that I allowed it. The best part of being used by folks who don't reside within my circle is this: My eyes are wide open now.
I will no longer strive to keep the peace in any situation that doesn't concern me. I say, let them duke it out if that's what's going to happen. I will no longer waste my precious time taking care of other people's responsibilities. I will continue to stand up for my beliefs, even if it pisses people off. I could care less. I will not change who I am because some people are uncomfortable. Get a fucking therapist if you can't handle it. Sounds harsh? Too bad, LOL!
As the world turns, life changes. Some people grow and some don't. We're all perfectly capable of adjusting our perspectives when the Universe throws us a curve ball. Yes, we can bitch about it for a short time (I sure did), but it's what you do after your initial reaction that will show the world who you really are. If you can't pull the positive out of a seemingly negative situation, then you're going to have a very difficult time dealing with reality and attracting what you really want in the future.
I'm not going to be one of those people. Life is too precious to be wasted on bullshit.
After I finished cleaning my office today, another epiphany came to me. Since March, I've spent more time taking care of other people and their issues that I've let myself fall by the wayside. I'm talking about my friends, my goals, my health and just my life in general. There weren't enough hours in the day to complete everything, so I thought, "You'll get your needs met tomorrow, Cristin." Of course tomorrow came and went. Still no time for Cristin's needs, but whose fault is that really? Mine, most definitely. So today I decided that I have to find a new way to compartmentalize my day to achieve my personal goals. My son's needs are my #1 priority, so I'm not talking about him here.
There are so many facets to a woman, it's not even funny. I think we've been physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually programmed for multi-tasking. Yes, at times it can appear to be too much, but that's only when we decide to stretch our energy to accommodate someone's smelly garbage. We have a tendency to take on other people's problems as if they're our own, unbeknownst to us. We also try our very best to take care of others' needs due to our need for accomplishment in certain areas of our lives. I generally don't feel the need to seek validation that way, but I seem to have formed that habit accidentally. Perhaps motherhood is to blame, I don't know. What I do know is this: During the last 8 months, I haven't done one note-worthy thing for myself...and that stops RIGHT NOW.
Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I love my son. I love the career path I've chosen. I love my family. I love my friends. I love my cats. I love my home and when I upgrade to a new one, I'll love that one as well. There's much more I haven't mentioned and I love those things too. Is there anything wrong with what I have? Absolutely NOT. I'm grateful. Grateful to my higher power for giving me the ability to create. I did this and without help. So why am I thinking so much? There's something missing and I can't exactly put my finger on it. I'm pretty sure I'd be happier if I had all those things I love so much in my daily routine. Ah, but that's just not possible, now is it?
There's always something that could make us happier with life, but I've always believed that one must want what they already have to achieve happiness and to be able to attract something new. I'm thankful. I love what I have. I think I just need to balance my time, like I said before. I think what bothers me the most is that I've allowed other people's crap to stunt my growth and take up so much of my time. Yes, you're sensing a tiny bit of resentment here, but don't worry, I'm taking care of that. The resentment is really directed toward myself, not anyone else in particular.
Here's the good news though. Yes I feel my time, energy, finances and the fact that I work from home has been taken advantage of over the years. Yes I acknowledge that I allowed it. The best part of being used by folks who don't reside within my circle is this: My eyes are wide open now.
I will no longer strive to keep the peace in any situation that doesn't concern me. I say, let them duke it out if that's what's going to happen. I will no longer waste my precious time taking care of other people's responsibilities. I will continue to stand up for my beliefs, even if it pisses people off. I could care less. I will not change who I am because some people are uncomfortable. Get a fucking therapist if you can't handle it. Sounds harsh? Too bad, LOL!
As the world turns, life changes. Some people grow and some don't. We're all perfectly capable of adjusting our perspectives when the Universe throws us a curve ball. Yes, we can bitch about it for a short time (I sure did), but it's what you do after your initial reaction that will show the world who you really are. If you can't pull the positive out of a seemingly negative situation, then you're going to have a very difficult time dealing with reality and attracting what you really want in the future.
I'm not going to be one of those people. Life is too precious to be wasted on bullshit.
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